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Secret Blessings

When was the last time you did something for your spouse that they would never find out about? All too often when we speak, build, cook, clean, purchase, give, or initiate there can be a variety of motives behind the action. It may be simply to express our love—and perhaps to draw closer as a result of what we did. Sometimes our efforts are to get us out of some kind of trouble. Even worse, our overtures can be a ploy to manipulate our mate to do something in return that we would enjoy.

But what about doing something that your spouse never finds out about—something that is for their benefit and known only to you and God? You may come up with a variety of examples of how this could play out in your marriage. We want to suggest one idea that costs nothing and can have untold benefits for your and your spouse:

“When your spouse is asleep, gently touch them and pray for God’s blessings on them.”

Perhaps you silently 🙂 pray a simple prayer like, “God, thank you for ________. Bless _________ and give them your favor in all they do.” You may choose to pray for things that you know are weighing on your spouse’s heart. It could be their health, stress at work, wisdom with their parents, insight with the children, richness of friendships—God will guide you in what to pray!

Here are three reasons why you should do this:

1. You usher favor into your marriage

From cover to cover in the Bible there are examples of blessings being conferred on others. From God’s blessing of Adam and Eve, to Simeon blessing Joseph and Mary, to the final blessing in Revelation—over 400 times favor is being given by God or by people to others.

When you pray silently for your mate, God sees and hears what takes place in secret. He knows your heart. Your prayers invite His grace on your spouse. As they are blessed, your marriage is blessed.

2. It’s the purest expression of love

There is no self in an act known only to you and God. In the context of giving, Jesus said, “Your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.” (Matthew 6:4)

The kudos aren’t being sought from your spouse, but they are given by God. You honor Him when you keep certain prayers private, like a treasure being stored up for your husband or wife. And these private expressions of love deepen your relationship with God.

3. It deepens your love for your spouse

When you extend yourself for your spouse to gain nothing in return, there is a supernatural endearment that comes into you for them. As you honor and treasure them, your heart follows. In fact, Jesus said, “Where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” (Matthew 6:21)

You will notice over time that you are more attentive to your spouse. Your tenderness will increase. As they face various challenges, you will find that you are for them in deeper ways than ever before.

So late at night, or early in the morning, lightly touch your spouse, say a prayer of blessing, and as a result you will build your marriage.