“Happy New Year!” These words bring hope. Beginnings. New opportunities. Motivation. A chance to start again. Dreams. As a new year approaches, we look forward to the opportunity for a fresh start and a chance to improve our marriage.
According to a 2022 poll by YouGov, 37% of Americans said they had a goal or resolution they wanted to achieve in 2023. 87% said they were very or somewhat likely to keep it through the year. What would you like to achieve or do differently to build your marriage in the new year? What steps can you take to improve your marriage starting today?
Here are some resolutions you can implement to build your marriage:
- Give your spouse five non-sexual touches each day. Hold their hand. Put your arm around them. Pat their back. Touch makes your spouse feel noticed, valued, and important.
- Tell your spouse something you appreciate about them every day for the next year. It could be a word or a phrase. Start by saying, “Darling, I really appreciate your positive attitude….” Or their joy, energy, smile. You could focus on some of their skills. “You’re a great provider for our family.” “I love how you often encourage the kids.” Not only will this be uplifting for your spouse but it will also help you focus on your spouse’s positive traits.
- Join a couple’s small group. Often you can find these opportunities through your local church.
- Read a devotional book or marriage book together.
- Attend a marriage conference together this year. We know a couple who makes it a priority to go to one every year. (For a list of our conferences go to https://buildyourmarriage.org/events/)
- Kiss passionately (5 minutes or more) at least once a week.
- Have technology-free dinners. No phones or screens. Instead focus on your spouse and your kids. Talk to each other.
- Go on a date with your spouse at least once a month. If money is tight, go for a walk, play tennis, watch a sunset, or get ice-cream. Every date doesn’t have to cost money. Be creative and have fun.
- Find another couple who will commit to pray for your marriage – and you do the same for them.
- Think of something you’ve always wanted to do – a trip, sporting event, concert, or dinner. Plan it. Put it on your calendar. Save for it or better yet, put the money aside now to pay for it. Perhaps purchase an annual pass to a local zoo or state park so you can have several dates there throughout the year without having to pay for each individual visit. In our city, King’s Island Amusement Park is a big attraction. Several of our friends have an annual pass to the park and go there often throughout the year.
- To understand and know your spouse better get our book, Build Your Marriage One Day at a Time. This book has 366 questions, one for every day of the year. As you both answer each day’s question you’ll gain a deeper appreciation and connection with each other.
- Pray together daily. When we pray as couples, we bring God’s blessing into our marriage. We grow in intimacy. As we seek God’s guidance he will lead us. Praying together is one of the best ways to strengthen your marriage.
Look over this list. Talk about it together. Which resolution would take your marriage to the next level? Together choose one, two or three of these and commit this coming year to build your marriage.